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Don't Stand By

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Gary Turk

A spoken word film with an important message for bystanders about how we all have the power to shape the culture around us. Let’s all do our part to put an end to harassment and stand up for each other.

‘Don’t Stand By’ is a film about the power of the bystander, if we stand up for others rather than look away or ignore the signs. Together, we can make room for something better.

Written, Performed & Directed by Gary Turk.
Produced in partnership with Rethink Compliance.
https://www.rethinkcomplianceco.com/

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Principal Cinematography by Jamie O’Mara
Additional footage by Steve Nutley
Edited by Gary Turk
Music by Josh Kramer

The Words:
He says she should take it as a compliment;
He was just trying to please her.
That she is wearing that for a reason,
Inviting him to squeeze her.
That she is asking for it,
Wanting him to tease her.
He gives it up, he goes away,
But the fear it never leaves her.

Nobody see’s her, yet everyone is staring,
Will anyone believe her, is her story worth sharing.
She starts doubting herself, looks at what she is wearing,
Maybe what he did was OK, because everyone let him.
And that’s when it becomes our fault too.
The bystanders, turning a blind eye,
If we look a bit closer at those standing by, we’ll find why.

When we see something happen, and others are there,
We all assume someone will help, that someone will care.
And so we sit and we stare, and watch everyone reacting,
Deciding how to act by the way others are acting.
And so we give the appearance, that what we’re watching is allowed,
Letting a victim be harassed, to feel alone in a crowd.

It’s as bad if it happens once, than if it happens many times,
There is no excuse to let it be, or to not spot the signs,
There are inferred lines, that no one should go near,
So if it’s you that sees blurred lines, then it’s you that’s unclear.

Harassment doesn’t just happen to women,
But it does more often than not,
Harassment doesn’t just have to be sexual,
As other kinds still happen a lot.
Be it their age, race or religion, or because they’re LGBTQ
It’s targeting peoples differences that may not be like you.

It’s bullying, it’s shaming, it’s being a bit sleazy,
It’s threatening, it’s joking, it’s making them uneasy.
It’s being treated like property, or treated like prey,
It can be something they do, or something they say,
From crude comments in emails, to far away stares,
Or a hand on the knee, to a body against theirs.

It can be rewards for favours, or punishing those who refuse,
It can be mocking or threatening or trust that’s misused.
There are clues, to spot someone mistreated,
Appearing alone, sad or nervous, or somewhat defeated,
Was there a change in their work, or the way you were greeted.
Let them know you are there, anytime that you’re needed.

Being around your harasser, without being harassed,
Leaves you constantly reminded, reliving your past.
But most people don’t report it, or want to risk it alone,
Through the fear of retaliation, or being met with a groan.
We need to open the conversation, provide victims with a saviour,
They’re not trying to end careers, they want to end the behaviour.

A few words from a bystander, can bring the misery to a halt,
“I noticed that”, “Are you OK with that”, “It’s not your fault”.
“You didn’t do anything wrong”.

By telling your story, you are validating others,
One in three women, that’s wives, daughters, and mothers.
Don’t bottle it up, let it out, speak up and complain,
Don’t let it eat you from the inside where we can’t see your pain.

Victims quit their jobs, more than fix things where they are,
And as they exit, and drop out, they’re stopped from going far,
It leaves a scar on our economy, when we lose people at speed,
They’re the missing people in power, that we need to succeed.

Once we notice the signs, we can do our part to make it stop
We can step up to support and rise together to the top,
Let’s make room for something better, where no one feels ashamed,
Where silence is heard and people’s lives are reclaimed.

Let’s create a new climate, where we accept peoples feelings,
Where kindness fights ugliness, and we rethink our meanings,
The words ‘complainer’, ‘over reactor’ and ‘weak’ should be rejected;
We need to change the language, to ‘Strong’, ‘brave’ and ‘respected’.

We can live in a world, where no one has to survive,
Where harassment is not tolerated, and anyone can thrive.
We need to stamp out this behaviour, together as one,
Not just for the victims, but for the victims to come,
For the world we could have, when all’s said and done.

Copyright © 2018 Gary Turk
All Rights Reserved

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