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In a really jazzy/latin mood right now
Listening to Acoustic Alchemy Lazeez

The Time I was a Complete DBag in Middle School

During my middle school years, I was quite popular. I didn't know it at the time but I was. It was only as a conscious adult did I realize this. OR, I am full of crap. That might be true as well however, I am sticking with MY idea :p

It was during my seventh year and due to word of mouth, I found out that a girl liked me. Her name was Kendra and she was much taller than I was. That did not bother me at all. Her cousin Chanel called me up one night and asks me if I wanted to "go with" Kendra. I gave her the nonchalant "sure, why not" and it was on.

I spent the next few weeks talking to this girl on the phone as we did before cell phones and text messages became a thing. Remember kids, Uncle Curt grew up in the 70s90s. Anyway, I wasn't really sure how I felt about her. There were things that bothered me about her. Kendra was sweet, but my goodness did she just BATHE in an obnoxious perfume. I think it was called Electric Youth by Debbie Gibson. It smelled like shit, guys. All the girls were wearing it. All the girls smelled like ass. It was gross.

When we would go out, my nose just burned the whole time. Another thing is that she was just so boring. Like, she didn't make me laugh. Half of the time I spent on the phone with her was with Chanel who DID make laugh. I just wasn't really into Kendra. She was pretty but that wasn't enough for me. Even at that age, I knew that I wanted someone as weird as I am.

On a fateful Friday night soon after, I met up with my cousin, some of his friends and some of their female friends at Fun Factory. Fun Factory was a large video game center. That's what we did. That's how we socialized back then. We went to the mall, to the game centers and to high school football games. Anyway, I did not know these girls but all of them were kinda cute. I didn't dwell too much into that, though. I had a woman! *beats chest*. The night ended and I went home. Well, my mom picked me up.

Days went by then my cousin called me up and told me that "Tiffany" liked me and wanted to "Check me out". I was flabbergasted. Tiffany was the alpha female of her group. She was weird, funny and very pretty. But again, I had a girlfriend.

The next day at school, there was a dance. It was one of those dances were everyone is extremely awkward and shy until the weirdoes decided it was time to let loose and be weird. I however, decided to walk outside and hang out by the monkey bars with the other derelict children. Chanel came outside to tell me that Kendra was looking for me and wanted to dance. I immediately said "No thanks, tell her I'm dumping her".

Welp. Chanel stormed off and told her. A few minutes later, I saw Kendra burst out of the cafeteria where the dance was being held and sat down on the sidewalk crying. I went over to console her like an absolute knob and told her that I was sorry and that I was going out with someone else. I even patted her on her head like she was a dog. Sheesh! I am shaking my head as I type this.

That night I called Tiffany and then we became a thing :p


...Chanel asked me out a few days later

Eh, it was middle school.