We breathe without even thinking about it. However, when we do start to think about each breath, something changes. Likewise, when we pause to consider what is really going on with the people around us, some things become remarkably clear. Childhood trauma can affect a person’s entire life, but changing how we respond to others makes a big difference to individuals and our whole society. Caige Jambor explains how socialemotional learning (SEL) changes the conversation from “What’s wrong with you?” to “What happened to you?” and how everyone can begin to use SEL tools. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at https://www.ted.com/tedx